I regret that I have but one life to give towards avoidance of military duty.
Meh Thoughts
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When Jokes Turn Serious: The Singing Saga
I thought my wife was joking when she said she’d leave me if I didn’t stop singing “I’m a Believer.”
Then I saw her face. -
Sofishticated
What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?
Sofishticated.
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Neighbor Can’t Sleep at 2am
My neighbor knocked on my door at 2am this morning and said, “I can’t sleep.”
“Well it’s your lucky day,” I said. “We’ve got a party going on in here, come in.”
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Nudist Contemplation
As I folded the third load of laundry this morning, I contemplated on becoming a nudist.
Then I remembered what I look like naked, and I kept folding…
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I went to a hypnotist to unlock some hidden trauma from my childhood.
I went to a hypnotist to unlock some hidden trauma from my childhood. Apparently during the first several years of my life, I thought I was a chicken.
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The problem with being a scat freak with a cold is that nobody
The problem with being a scat freak with a cold is that nobody knows what to think when you tell them you feel like fucking shit.
