What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts?
A barberqueue.
Meh Thoughts
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Moo-spaper
How do cows stay up to date?
They read the moo-spaper.
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Strongest Days
Which days are the strongest?
Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.
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Weekend Immune System
I only seem to get sick on weekdays.
I must have a weekend immune system.
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Disgruntled Employee
For the Halloween party at work this year, I went as a disgruntled employee.
The costume was simple: all I had to do was wear my regular clothes and improve my attitude.
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Best Costume
A sure-fire way to win “best costume” at the next Halloween party is to have somebody embed a real chainsaw blade into your shoulder.
Timing is crucial, though — you don’t want to pass out from loss of blood after 10 minutes, long before the costume judging begins, like I did.
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Nine Volt Battery
What’s the difference between a nine-volt battery and a butthole?
Everyone knows not to stick their tongue on a nine-volt battery.
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In a Nutshell
Do you want a brief explanation of what an acorn is?
In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.
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They Were Wright
About a hundred years ago a couple brothers said they could fly.
They were Wright.
