All sunglasses, no matter how expensive, pretty much look the same after you sit on them.
Meh Thoughts
-
Not Looked Back Since
To save money on fuel I took the mirrors off of my car to reduce drag.
I’ve not looked back since.
-
Tonight’s forecast: Overnight highs in the mid 70s with mostly
Tonight’s forecast: Overnight highs in the mid 70s with mostly cloudy skies and a 60% chance of me cornholing your sister.
-
They say love means different things to different people — but my lawyer has instructed
They say love means different things to different people — but my lawyer has instructed me not to say what it means to me until after the trial.
-
I’ve got nothing against gay guys — I just don’t want my sister marrying one.
I’ve got nothing against gay guys — I just don’t want my sister marrying one.
-
Poor Mrs. Claus. Her only options for hot sex involve an old
Poor Mrs. Claus. Her only options for hot sex involve an old obese guy, dozens of guys with one-inch cocks, and a herd of oddly named deer.
-
In your early 30s, you start to get depressed because you realize that your life may
In your early 30s, you start to get depressed because you realize that your life may very well be half over. By the time you hit 40, you’re relieved because you realize that your life may very well be half over.
-
When she said was into leather and chains, I bought her a Harley
When she said was into leather and chains, I bought her a Harley riding jacket. When she said she liked watersports, I naively showed up with my snorkel. So today when she told me she had some shit to do around the house, I decided to stay away altogether, just in case.
-
How’s It Hangin
If you ever make the grueling trek to speak to the wise old man who lives at the top of the mountain and he lets you ask one question of him, don’t make the mistake I did and blurt out, “How’s it hangin’?”
