My new girlfriend is very talented: After oral sex she blows semen bubbles then twists them into balloon animals!
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Man in the Mirror
I heard Michael Jackson singing about the “Man in the Mirror.” What, was there somebody standing behind him?
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Dogs are man’s best friend. You can tell this because all your
Dogs are man’s best friend. You can tell this because all your other friends will stop having anything to do with you if you have their balls cut off.
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I hate dating a pharmacist. He always puts stickers on me
I hate dating a pharmacist. He always puts stickers on me saying, “Not to be taken orally.”
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Dentist Impressions
I was at the dentist this afternoon for some impressions.
He does a good Johnny Carson but his Frank Sinatra is terrible.
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Turns out that my wife ascribes to a double standard during sex:
Turns out that my wife ascribes to a double standard during sex: using “cum” as a verb is acceptable, whereas using it as a noun is not.
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I like using the iPhone to send pictures of myself totally nude
I like using the iPhone to send pictures of myself totally nude to my boyfriend, but the lighting in these Apple stores sucks.
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I cried because I had no shoes. Then I met a wanker who had no dick
I cried because I had no shoes. Then I met a wanker who had no dick.
