You know that guy who keeps winning every day on the game show “Jeopardy!”? Betcha I could kick his ass at Quarters. Ha! Take another shot, pencil neck!
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
-
A Remarkable Guy
My friend Mark changed his name to something else, but now he’s thinking about changing it back.
Truly a remarkable guy.
-
If I wrote Star Trek, the Prime Directive would be “Face down,
If I wrote Star Trek, the Prime Directive would be “Face down, ass up.” Maybe that’s why I don’t do well with Trekkers.
-
Pretty Good Footage
My cellphone accidentally took a 10-minute video of my shoes yesterday…
It was some pretty good footage.
-
Nguyen-Nguyen Situation
My boss decided to hire two Vietnamese brothers instead of one.
It was a Nguyen-Nguyen situation.
-
I still don’t understand what went wrong. I thought it was a
I still don’t understand what went wrong. I thought it was a pretty foolproof idea to take my animal-loving, PETA-member girlfriend down to Tijuana for a real, live donkey show.
-
Two Mormons: Double the Fun, Less the Beer!
Why would you invite two Mormons to go fishing?
Because if you only invite one, they’ll drink all your beer.
-
My new girlfriend is very talented: After oral sex she blows
My new girlfriend is very talented: After oral sex she blows semen bubbles then twists them into balloon animals!
-
Sometimes a girl just needs to hear those three little words:
Sometimes a girl just needs to hear those three little words: “I’d hit that.”
-
How About Now
My wife yelled from upstairs and asked, “Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body, like someone’s got a voodoo doll of you and they’re stabbing it?”
I replied, “No.”
She responded, “How about now?”
