Did you hear about the Italian chef with a terminal illness?
He pastaway.
Cannoli do so much.
Now hes just a pizza history.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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The Italian Chef Passed Away
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I like my coffee like I like my women: half-digested and culled
I like my coffee like I like my women: half-digested and culled from the feces of the Asian Palm Civet.
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Back at work tomorrow
A morgue worker died today.
But he’ll be back at work tomorrow. -
Gators vs. Crocs: Timing is Everything!
What’s the difference between an alligator, and a crocodile?
One you will see later; the other after a while.
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It’s Hard to Say
I told my wife I absolutely love Worcestershire sauce.
She asked what’s so special about it.
“It’s hard to say,” I answered.
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Lifting up my bra in New Orleans should have gotten me a
Lifting up my bra in New Orleans should have gotten me a standing ovation, but “that don’t help the houses get built!” according to my douchebag Habitat for Humanity supervisor.
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I’ve Come a Long Way
It’s been 3 years since I started training for the ejaculation distance championships.
Since then I’ve come a long way.
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When your girlfriend has a sore throat, it’s probably not a good
When your girlfriend has a sore throat, it’s probably not a good idea to offer your manhood as a soothing lozenge. Not so much because it’s inconsiderate, but because the prospect of catching strep-penis sounds quite unpleasant.
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There So Stupid
I hate it when people don’t know the difference between your and you’re.
There so stupid.
