Urinal proverb: A watched penis never pisses.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Folgers Crystals for the Blood Bank
I’ve been saving up all my picked-off scabs in little bags, just in case the local blood bank needs some Folgers crystals.
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Whenever someone with Alzheimer’s tries to apologize to me, I
Whenever someone with Alzheimer’s tries to apologize to me, I tell them to just forget about it.
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I fucked that guy down at the car wash twice today. I wanted to
I fucked that guy down at the car wash twice today. I wanted to be there for the second cumming of Jesus.
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Well, that didn’t work
My wife and I were discussing our eventual deaths…
I said my worst fear was dying alone, and that I wanted the last thing I hear to be her telling me she loves me.
She gave me a big hug, said, “I love you,” and then waited.
After a couple of seconds, she shook her head and said, “Well, that didn’t work.”
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(Lori Petterson) Happiness is finding a freshly cleaned gas
(Lori Petterson) Happiness is finding a freshly cleaned gas station restroom when you have to poo.
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Ancient grease
An archaeologist found a 2,000-year-old oil stain.
Ancient grease. -
The Clapper and the Mime
Does the Clapper still turn the lights on if a mime is doing the clapping?
