What do you call a blonde doing a handstand?
A brunette with bad breath!
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Left Side Cut Off? He’s All Right!
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
He’s all right now. -
It’s Perfectly Normal
When my daughters were much younger, I tried to explain to them that it’s perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants.
But they still make fun of me.
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No Canaries in Canary or Virgin Islands
There are no canaries on Canary Island. The same thing is true about the Virgin Islands.
There are no canaries there, either.
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Before and After Marriage
Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves.
After marriage, the “Y” becomes silent.
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Big Tits on Babies
My wife asked me if I wish she had been born with big tits.
I told her that I find big tits on babies disturbing.
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My wife can’t figure out why I love staying up late to do our
My wife can’t figure out why I love staying up late to do our taxes. What she doesn’t know is that my process involves writing “I.R.S.” on the forehead of a blow-up doll and repeatedly ramming it in the ass.
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Taking Out the Bodies of the Previous Owners
I really enjoy taking out the trash from my new home. It’s hard to explain, but walking the trash to the curb the night before trash day really makes me feel like a homeowner. Especially now that I’ve taken out the bodies of the previous owners.
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He’s a web designer
My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing it.
We had a few drinks. Turns out he’s a web designer.
