What is the speed limit of sex?
68 — because at 69 you have to turn around.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Not Enough Because I Have to Go Back Tomorrow
I just asked my son what he learned today at school, and he told me, “Not enough, because I have to go back tomorrow.”
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I wouldn’t have to pay so much
The zoo should be open 24 hours a day. That way, when I’m drunk at 3 a.m. and feel like seeing a monkey, I wouldn’t have to pay so much.
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I don’t understand people who get all upset about people pissing
I don’t understand people who get all upset about people pissing in the shower. That said, shitting in the shower is COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE.
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You Guys Have No Life
What did Earth say to the other planets?
Wow, you guys have no life.
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“Oh, the Places You’ll Go!” has a very different meaning for
“Oh, the Places You’ll Go!” has a very different meaning for those into scat.
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Spain and Portugal Fit Like a Glove
Continental drift is no mere theory; it is fact. Forget about trying to fit Africa and South America together — just look at how Spain’s jagged western border fits Portugal’s jagged eastern border like a glove. Coincidence? Please.
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“There’s no ‘i’ in team,” my boss told me. I smugly pointed out
“There’s no ‘i’ in team,” my boss told me. I smugly pointed out to him that there’s no “i” in “Fuck you, asshole” either.
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Still Wouldn’t Tell Me Why It Crossed the Road
I grilled a chicken for two hours…
Still wouldn’t tell me why it crossed the road.
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Open Mike Night
I’m hosting an autopsy club meeting tonight!
It’s “Open Mike Night”!
