Sure, I procrastinate sometimes. But I still think it’s important to keep the “Christ” in “Presidents Day.”
Meh Thoughts
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A Nasty Habit
I met a nun who wiped her nose on her clothes.
She had a nasty habit.
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If it’s so damned all-loving, why doesn’t the Light get off its lazy ass and come down
If it’s so damned all-loving, why doesn’t the Light get off its lazy ass and come down the tunnel to see *us*?!?
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My buddy thought I was nuts when we spotted an extremely large
My buddy thought I was nuts when we spotted an extremely large woman and I said, “Man! I’d like to get all up in dat!” What he doesn’t understand is that my comment was actually about my return-to-the-womb issues.
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Suing the Airlines for Mishandling My Luggage
I hired a lawyer to sue the airlines for mishandling my luggage.
They lost the case.
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I can always tell when I’m getting better after being sick when
I can always tell when I’m getting better after being sick when I again feel well enough to jerk off to Shake-Weight commericals on YouTube.
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Note to self: It’s not “boner-fide” opportunity. Follow-up note
Note to self: It’s not “boner-fide” opportunity. Follow-up note to self: Who cares? I got the job!
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“HOLY MACKEREL!” I exclaimed as I finally came. I never imagined
“HOLY MACKEREL!” I exclaimed as I finally came. I never imagined how great the sensation would be when fucking a pierced fish corpse.
