The best part of waking up is not about coffee in my cup. It’s realizing I’m still young enough to have morning wood.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Dating Nostalgia: A Dinner with a Twist!
My wife complained that I don’t treat her like I did when we were dating.
So I took her to dinner and dropper her off at her parent’s house. -
It’s all fun and games until someone tries to text “autocorrect”
It’s all fun and games until someone tries to text “autocorrect” but the autocorrect feature changes the word to “autofellate.” Then it’s just fucking hysterical.
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People often wonder how I climbed the corporate ladder so
People often wonder how I climbed the corporate ladder so quickly. Personally, I think it’s due to my ignoring my career counselor’s advice and refusing to remove “fellatio expert” from my resume.
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I took all the money I saved not buying Valentine’s Day presents
I took all the money I saved not buying Valentine’s Day presents over the years and bought masturbation toys. Now I own a solid gold fuck stick.
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“HOLY MACKEREL!” I exclaimed as I finally came. I never imagined
“HOLY MACKEREL!” I exclaimed as I finally came. I never imagined how great the sensation would be when fucking a pierced fish corpse.
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(Jilly G.) Hiccups are God’s way of saying, “You ain’t getting
(Jilly G.) Hiccups are God’s way of saying, “You ain’t getting head tonight.”
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are not an “up and comer” in life
are not an “up and comer” in life.
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There’s nothing sexier than a really smart guy. Unless we’re
There’s nothing sexier than a really smart guy. Unless we’re talking about sex, then a huge dick is really hot, too.
