A friend of mine had a penis extension.
And now his house looks stupid.
Meh Thoughts
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I stand corrected
I thought physical therapy was a big scam until I finally went to one for my lower back.
I stand corrected.
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Painted It Black So It Would Run Faster
I just bought a new laptop and painted it black so it would run faster…
Instead, it just stopped working and stole all my data…
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Doctors recommend Pepto Bismol for their patients not already
Doctors recommend Pepto Bismol for their patients not already shitting horrifying, jet-black concrete.
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Life sucks, then you die.
Life sucks, then you die. It’s *that* great an orgasm.
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Don’t you hate it when you’re about to cum and the guy does
Don’t you hate it when you’re about to cum and the guy does something to ruin it? You know, like speaking.
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When you’re saving for retirement, it’s important to diversify.
When you’re saving for retirement, it’s important to diversify. Example: I have 33% of my savings in stocks, 33% in bonds and 34% in Chuck E. Cheese game tokens. I plan on whacking a ton of moles and playing a buttload of skee ball in my golden years.
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My boyfriend and I play this little game where I sext him “Guess
My boyfriend and I play this little game where I sext him “Guess where my finger is now” and he guesses. It’s weird, though, how he never guesses “in the cat’s ass.”
