Meh Thoughts

Meh thoughts

Short thoughts for long downward spirals

Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.

  • The End Was in Sight

    As soon as the hospital made me put on one of those little gowns, I knew the end was in sight.

  • Only Have a Croc Pot

    I was going to cook alligator for dinner…

    But then I realized I only have a croc pot.

  • I Have Never Been a Mourning Person

    I have a friend who passed away recently and they are having the funeral at 7am. I’ve decided not to go… I have never been a mourning person.

  • He Takes Things Personally

    Did you hear about the sensitive burglar?

    He takes things personally!

  • At a Pawn Shop

    Where is the best place to sell a used chess set?

    At a pawn shop.

  • Every Week You Get New Matches

    In other news, there’s a new dating app that caters to arsonists.

    Every week you get new matches!

  • You Carry the One

    How do you get 100 math teachers into a room in which only 99 fit?

    You carry the one.

  • Left Another Accordion

    I left my car unattended with my accordion on view in the front passenger seat. When I got back, someone had broken into my car

    and left another accordion.

  • Bread in Captivity

    I went to the zoo last week. The first exhibit was a ciabatta, the second a baguette, and the third a brioche.

    They were all bread in captivity.

  • Rearrange the Letters of POSTMEN

    If you rearrange the letters of POSTMEN…

    They become VERY ANGRY.

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