What can I say, I’m good in bed. And I have the collection of melted vibrators to prove it.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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A ceiling rafter
I found a guy kayaking in my attic when I got home from work today…
It turns out he was a ceiling rafter.
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A poet once asked “What’s in a name?” as a way of teaching
A poet once asked “What’s in a name?” as a way of teaching others to not make superficial judgments. Still, if the name is “Mother Fucking Douche Bag Asswipe III,” I think it would be safe to make at least a few assumptions.
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I got my super power the same way Spider-Man did. Except instead
I got my super power the same way Spider-Man did. Except instead of my hand, I got bit on my cock. And instead of a radioactive spider, it was a cheap hooker. And my “power” is Hepatitis C. Other than that though, it’s exactly the same.
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Painted It Black So It Would Run Faster
I just bought a new laptop and painted it black so it would run faster…
Instead, it just stopped working and stole all my data…
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Blind at the Beach: Finding Clarity
How do you spot a blind person at a nude beach?
It’s not hard. -
I guess I’ll just have to come to grips with the fact that, no
I guess I’ll just have to come to grips with the fact that, no matter how funny *I* think it is, my wife will never appreciate it when I let a few chocolate chips melt in my hand and ask her where the toilet paper is.
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Make Up Your Mind
I recently had someone tell me to stop being an idiot and to be myself.
I told them to make up their mind.
