Meh Thoughts

Meh thoughts

Short thoughts for long downward spirals

Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.

  • Neurosurgeon Girlfriend

    I had to break up with my neurosurgeon girlfriend. She was messing with my head.

  • I should have known that the way I learned to “dissemenate”

    I should have known that the way I learned to “dissemenate” information at the porn conference wouldn’t work at the PTA meeting.

  • I can’t do anything about it

    The company I work for is knowingly making defective whistles.
    I can’t do anything about it.

  • From Chicken to Commitment: A Love Story

    Five years ago I started a game of Gay Chicken with my friend.
    Now we own a dog together, we moved to Vermont to start a cute little bed and breakfast, and we’re thinking of adopting a kid. If he doesn’t give up soon, I think he might actually be gay.

  • Cookie Monster Waste

    The amount of cookies I’ve watched the Cookie Monster waste with his bullshit chewing makes me sick.

  • Sign Language

    A hand job from a deaf person counts as oral.

  • Open Mike Night

    I’m hosting an autopsy club meeting tonight!

    It’s “Open Mike Night”!

  • Making Every Second Count in Toyland!

    I just got a job making toy Dracula dolls.
    There’s only 1 other employee, so I have to make every second count.

  • Those are just contractions

    A woman in labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”
    “Don’t worry,” said the doctor. “Those are just contractions.”

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