As I watched my two-year-old drag his naked bottom across the carpet, I realized that perhaps I overestimated the transferability of the toilet-training skills I had initially honed with our puppies.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
-
The elevator at work is possessed by horny demons! Every time I
The elevator at work is possessed by horny demons! Every time I get in, there’s a mystical voice that says, “Going down.”
-
I can never remember the trucker grammatical rule. Is it “fuck”
I can never remember the trucker grammatical rule. Is it “fuck” before “shit” except after “cocksucker,” or the other way around?
-
A Nasty Habit
I met a nun who wiped her nose on her clothes.
She had a nasty habit.
-
An EpiPen Legacy: Love Beyond Allergies
I inherited an EpiPen from my grandfather. He wanted me to get it. That was his dying wish.
Weird, I know, I’m not even allergic.
-
And then I saw her face
When my girlfriend said she was leaving because of my obsession with The Monkees, I thought she was joking.
And then I saw her face… -
Your Dad Was Better at It
Growing up, my mom would never hit me or my brother.
When I asked her why, she said, “Because your dad was better at it.”
-
I have a penis and know how to cook. Laydeez! I’m one-stop
I have a penis and know how to cook. Laydeez! I’m one-stop shopping for feeding and fucking!
