I think that for Halloween I’ll dress as a candy bar with a sign that says “Eat Me,” then visit Overeaters and Sex Addicts support groups and see who cries more.
Tone: dark
Dark jokes, grim memes, and humor with the lights off and the judgment missing from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
-
I should be chosen Small Business Owner of the Year now that
I should be chosen Small Business Owner of the Year now that I’ve finally solved once and for all the issue about sexual harrassment in my business. Nobody ELSE thought of hiring only prostitutes.
-
With my luck, I’ll end up with the world’s first diagnosed case
With my luck, I’ll end up with the world’s first diagnosed case of “genital anthrax.” And when they find out I work at the post office, the boss is really going to question my mail-handling procedures.
-
If you’re stranded at a cannibal commune and forced to eat a
If you’re stranded at a cannibal commune and forced to eat a penis butter and jelly sandwich, at least tell them you’d prefer they used creamy, not chunky.
-
I think getting Amanda Bynes alone would be the hard part.
I think getting Amanda Bynes alone would be the hard part. Convincing her my cock dispenses thorazine should be a piece of cake.
-
The best thing about solitary confinement: Nobody walks in while
The best thing about solitary confinement: Nobody walks in while I’m masturbating.
-
Farting in a baby’s face should be legal. It’s not sexual if
Farting in a baby’s face should be legal. It’s not sexual if you’re trying to teach them an important life lesson.
-
Peanut allergies can cause rash, shortness of breath, toxic
Peanut allergies can cause rash, shortness of breath, toxic shock and me calling your kid a fucking pussy.
