Ironic Jokes, Memes & Dark Humor

Waldo: Worth It or Just a Rip-Off?

I think I got ripped off.
I just paid $15 for the “Where’s Waldo” audio book.

I interviewed 10,000 thousand people who had played Russian roulette and not a single one of them were harmed from the game.

I’ve had a lot of average students.

But none of them have been as mean as the ones I have this year.

A man meets a genie who grants him three wishes, but warns him: whatever he asks for, his ex-wife gets twice as much.

“Well,” says the man, “for my first wish, beat me half to death.”

There are no canaries on Canary Island. The same thing is true about the Virgin Islands.

There are no canaries there, either.

If I ever blow up a building, I’m going to wire the bomb so that it goes off with 10 seconds still showing on the timer.

Won’t that guy with the wire cutters be surprised!