When my boyfriend sent me to get a Brazilian, I first thought I was going to fuck a hot chick from Rio. Either way, now I can’t fucking walk.
Tone: irreverent
Irreverent humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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I don’t know what I’m going to miss the most about my girlfriend
I don’t know what I’m going to miss the most about my girlfriend now that we’re ending our relationship, but I’ve narrowed it down to one of three things: her tits, her tits, or her tits.
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Confucius say: Pierced man who has sex with blow-up doll get
Confucius say: Pierced man who has sex with blow-up doll get more bang for buck.
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I think maybe “all that AND a bag of chips” was a bad response
I think maybe “all that AND a bag of chips” was a bad response when my boyfriend asked me what I stuck in his ass.
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My girlfriend is going to dress up as a “naughty nurse” for the
My girlfriend is going to dress up as a “naughty nurse” for the Halloween party we’re attending. Awesome! When we get back home, tonight’s rectal thermometer session will be that much more authentic.
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The elevator at work is possessed by horny demons! Every time I
The elevator at work is possessed by horny demons! Every time I get in, there’s a mystical voice that says, “Going down.”
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(Bonnie) I’m a conservationist at heart and take pride in my
(Bonnie) I’m a conservationist at heart and take pride in my innovative recycling ideas. Did you know an old dildo works great as an egg-beater? Yup, you’ll get light, fluffy eggs every time.
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Reflecting on my latest Bible study reading, I told the group I
Reflecting on my latest Bible study reading, I told the group I felt bad for Lot. Can you imagine the pain one suffers when fucking a pillar of salt?
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I can always tell when I’m getting better after being sick when
I can always tell when I’m getting better after being sick when I again feel well enough to jerk off to Shake-Weight commericals on YouTube.
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So if you DON’T take any Viagra, then have 4-hour erection
So if you DON’T take any Viagra, then have 4-hour erection during a 4-hour threesome with two smoking hot women, are you still supposed to call a doctor? *I* did, but pretty much just to brag.
