“HOLY MACKEREL!” I exclaimed as I finally came. I never imagined how great the sensation would be when fucking a pierced fish corpse.
Tone: shocking
Shocking humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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(Tim H. Richweis) The biggest difference between my clitoris and
(Tim H. Richweis) The biggest difference between my clitoris and Osama bin Laden is that a guy actually found Osama bin Laden.
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I still don’t understand what went wrong. I thought it was a
I still don’t understand what went wrong. I thought it was a pretty foolproof idea to take my animal-loving, PETA-member girlfriend down to Tijuana for a real, live donkey show.
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The thing I find so disgusting about airport bathrooms is you
The thing I find so disgusting about airport bathrooms is you have no idea how many people have smeared a sheen of their semen on the toilet seat before you did.
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It takes a lot of effort to inflate a new love doll, but it’s
It takes a lot of effort to inflate a new love doll, but it’s worth it. The look of wide-eyed, open-mouthed excitement when you introduce your two ladies to each other pretty much guarantees you a three-way sandwich.
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No idea why my breakfast date was so surprised that I pulled out
No idea why my breakfast date was so surprised that I pulled out my tits during the meal. I clearly heard him say he wanted milk with his coffee.
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You know that feeling you’ve experienced something before, only
You know that feeling you’ve experienced something before, only it’s not *exactly* the same as you remember? Well the prostitute told me we should call it a “déjà do-over,” right before she noted that when we were college classmates together, she was a man.
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I think getting Amanda Bynes alone would be the hard part.
I think getting Amanda Bynes alone would be the hard part. Convincing her my cock dispenses thorazine should be a piece of cake.
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I fell asleep with the “calming nature rhythms” station on and
I fell asleep with the “calming nature rhythms” station on and woke in a cold sweat when humpback whales were about to fuck on top of me.
