Have you ever tried to donkey-punch yourself when jerking off? The toughest part is figuring out which sock puppet gets to do the deed.
Tone: shocking
Shocking humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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When I asked my boyfriend to give me a “shocker,” I wasn’t
When I asked my boyfriend to give me a “shocker,” I wasn’t expecting him to tell me that he fucked my mom.
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I saved some $5,000 in potential counseling bills trying to cure
I saved some $5,000 in potential counseling bills trying to cure my scat fetish, and all it took was having to change my twin nieces’ diapers over the holiday weekend.
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When I was in high school, I was abducted by an alien and anally
When I was in high school, I was abducted by an alien and anally probed. I don’t remember what the alien looked like, though, because it disguised itself as my wrestling coach and forced me to drink a mind-control drug from a tequila bottle.
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People often wonder how I climbed the corporate ladder so
People often wonder how I climbed the corporate ladder so quickly. Personally, I think it’s due to my ignoring my career counselor’s advice and refusing to remove “fellatio expert” from my resume.
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Scientists now say that a woman can go blind from playing with
Scientists now say that a woman can go blind from playing with her clit too much, but efsjusbh h djxusuhs,
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“HOLY MACKEREL!” I exclaimed as I finally came. I never imagined
“HOLY MACKEREL!” I exclaimed as I finally came. I never imagined how great the sensation would be when fucking a pierced fish corpse.
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(Tim H. Richweis) The biggest difference between my clitoris and
(Tim H. Richweis) The biggest difference between my clitoris and Osama bin Laden is that a guy actually found Osama bin Laden.
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I still don’t understand what went wrong. I thought it was a
I still don’t understand what went wrong. I thought it was a pretty foolproof idea to take my animal-loving, PETA-member girlfriend down to Tijuana for a real, live donkey show.
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The thing I find so disgusting about airport bathrooms is you
The thing I find so disgusting about airport bathrooms is you have no idea how many people have smeared a sheen of their semen on the toilet seat before you did.
