Tone: silly

Silly humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Personal Space

    Yesterday, one of my good friends told me I often make people uncomfortable by violating their personal space.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    It was an incredibly hurtful thing to say and completely ruined our bath.

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  • A Winery Job Interview

    At a winery, the regular taster died, and the director started looking for a new one to hire.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    A drunkard with a ragged, dirty look came in to apply for the position. The director of the winery wondered how to send him away. He gave him a glass to drink.

    The drunk tried it and said, “It’s a Muscat, three years old, grown on a north slope, matured in steel containers. Low grade, but acceptable.”

    “That’s correct,” said the boss. Another glass…

    “This is a Cabernet, eight years old, a south-western slope, oak barrels, matured at 8 degrees. Requires three more years for the finest results.”

    “Correct.” A third glass… “It’s a Pinot Blanc Champagne, high grade and exclusive,” the drunk said calmly.

    The director was astonished. He winked at his secretary, secretly suggesting something. She left the room and came back in with a glass of urine.

    The alcoholic tried it. “It’s a blonde, 26 years old, three months pregnant, and if I don’t get the job, I’ll name the father.”

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  • Bernie’s Hair

    Bernie’s Hair

    I DON'T ALWAYS COMB MY HAIR, BUT WHEN I DO, I USE A BALLOON.

  • A Magician’s Lost Magic

    A Magician’s Lost Magic

    What do you call a magician who has lost their magic?

    Ian.

  • Tigers’ False Eyes

    Tigers’ False Eyes

    Tigers have “false eyes” on the back of their ears to discourage predators from attacking them from behind

    I am slightly less terrified of tigers and 1000x more terrified of whatever the fuck a tiger considers a predator

    That Bitch Carole Baskins

  • When Someone Asks if You’ve Eaten Enough

    When Someone Asks if You’ve Eaten Enough

    When someone says "haven't you eaten enough?"

  • Karen and Karen

    Karen and Karen

    DISSATISFIED?

    Karen & Karen

    CUSTOMER SATISFACTION SPECIALISTS

    Sassy Employee? Order Wrong? 754-8465

  • Kmart Takes the Shutdown Seriously

    Kmart Takes the Shutdown Seriously

    Kudos to Kmart for taking the shutdown seriously

  • A Question About Straw Placement

    A Question About Straw Placement

    I dont know whats worse the straw placement or the eye contact you'll have to make while using it

  • A Coffee Order

    A Coffee Order

    “Some people call me the space cowboy”

    *leans in*

    “Some people call me the gangster of love”

    BARISTA: I'm just gonna put Steve on the cup