It turns out law school is a lot like elementary school. They assign you a locker, you meet new friends, and pulling the cute redhead’s pigtails still isn’t as good an idea as you think it is.
Tone: witty
Witty humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Just a shot in the dark
I was trying to get romantic with the new nurse at my doctor’s office, so I asked her to dim the lights before she gave me the tetanus booster.
I guess it was just a shot in the dark. -
That guy from You’re So Vain
You know, someone should introduce that woman from “Killing Me Softly,” who thinks the guy is singing about her, to that guy from “You’re So Vain.”
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Al Roker
Should NBC be concerned? They keep getting communications that affect the weather from some rogue terrorist group called “Al Roker.”
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You never leave fingerprints behind
The only thing I like about winter is that you wear gloves so much you never leave fingerprints behind.
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I bleed at the sight of someone passing out
I’ve always been different from most people. For instance, I bleed at the sight of someone passing out.
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Beat Up a Fifth Grader
I don’t think I’d do very well on that TV show, “Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?”
But if they ever have a spin-off called, “Can You Beat Up a Fifth Grader?” I’ll bet I could score some nice consolation prizes.
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The Top 17 Rejected Titles for the Fifty Shades of Grey Movie
17. There’s Something About Tying Up and Whipping Mary
16. Boundhog Day
15. Prince of Tied
14. Binding Nemo
13. Cloudy with a Chance of Beat Balls
12. Meet the Floggers
11. Back Side Story
10. The Hurt Licker
9. L*A*S*H
8. Rear Ender’s Game
7. 12 Angry Men and a Coed with Daddy Issues
6. 13 Years a Sex Slave
5. Lock, Stock, Cuffs, Shackles, Chains, Restraints, Ball Gags and Two Smoking Barrels
4. Blazing Paddles
3. Thor All Over
2. Dude, Where’s Your Fist?
1. Whip. Lash.
