What has one leg and licks balls?
My amputee girlfriend.
Delivery Style: setup-punchline
Setup-punchline joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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No Shit
Immediately after mass one Sunday morning, a man stops to shake the preacher’s hand. “That was a goddamned fine sermon you gave today,” the man tells the preacher. “Goddamned fine!”
“Thank you, sir,” the preacher answers, “but I’d rather you didn’t use that kind of foul, blasphemous language in the Lord’s house.”
“You know, I was so goddamned impressed with that fucking sermon that I put $5,000 in the goddamned offering plate!” says the man.
And the preacher says, “No shit!”
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Flappuccino
What is the female equivalent of teabagging?
A flappuccino.
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Mike Tyson’s Religion
How can you tell Mike Tyson does not like religion?
Because he punches everyone on their faith.
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Can’t Win a Mall
I entered a lottery to win an entire shopping center, but I failed.
I guess you can’t win a mall.
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Mirror Mirror
I want to have sex with someone who’s as attractive as I am.
That’s why I always masturbate in front of a mirror.
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Jesus vs. a Frame of Jesus
What’s the difference between Jesus and a frame of Jesus?
You can hang the frame with only one nail.
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Same Name
I should be happy because I have a new girlfriend. The problem is she has the same name as my sister. So every time we have sex now…
…all I think about is my new girlfriend.
