I asked the hot dog seller, “Can I get a jumbo sausage?”
He said, “Sure, won’t be long.”
I said, “In that case, can I have two?”
Delivery Style: setup-punchline
Setup-punchline joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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No But I Have a Boyfriend
I finally worked up the courage to ask my blind coworker if she was currently seeing anyone.
She said, “No, but I have a boyfriend.”
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Rented a Tux for Dad
This guy’s father dies, so he goes to the undertaker and tells him he wants the best of everything for his father. The funeral is absolutely beautiful, and the guy is extremely pleased.
The next day, the guy gets a bill for $16,085, and he pays it. The next month, he gets another bill for $85. He figures it’s just a little supplementary bill, so he pays that, too.
Next month, another bill for $85 arrives, so he calls up the undertaker and says, “I keep getting these bills for 85 dollars. I thought I paid for the funeral already.”
The undertaker says, “Well, you said you wanted the best for your father, so I rented him a tux.”
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A Pirated Copy
My friend said his favorite Star Wars quote was, “Aargh Luke, ye scurvy dog, I be yer father.”
I think he got a pirated copy.
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The Gynecologist Mechanic
A gynecologist had grown tired of malpractice insurance, paperwork, and burnout.
Hoping to start a new career where skilled hands would still be useful, he decided to become a mechanic.
He enrolled in evening classes at a local technical college, studied diligently, and learned everything he could.
When the practical exam finally arrived, he prepared carefully and completed it with tremendous skill.
A few days later, he received his results and was shocked to discover he had scored 150%.
Assuming there had been some kind of mistake, he called the instructor.
“I don’t mean to sound ungrateful,” he said, “but I think there may be an error in my score.”
The instructor replied, “During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly. That earned you 50%.”
“You then put the engine back together perfectly. That earned you the other 50%.”
After a brief pause, the instructor added:
“I gave you an extra 50% because you did the whole thing through the exhaust pipe, and I’ve never seen that done before.”
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The Blonde and the River
A blonde was staring dumbfounded at a rushing river blocking her path. As she wondered how to cross, she saw another blonde on the other side.
She yelled, “Hey, can you help me get to the other side?”
The other blonde replied, “You ARE on the other side!”
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The Blonde and the Gun
This blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her. She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and, sure enough, she opens the door to find him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is angry.
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