Two nuns are riding their bicycles through the village. One says, “I’ve never come this way before.”
The other replies, “Me neither. It must be the cobblestone.”
Delivery Style: surprise twist
Surprise twist joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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It must be the cobblestone
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Knitting and Vitamins: Baby’s Best Starts!
So there are these three pregnant women in the OB-GYN’s waiting room: a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde, all knitting baby sweaters.
So they knit and they knit and they knit. Then the redhead pops a pill. The other two gasp.
“It’s OK,” the redhead says. “This is just calcium. I want my baby to have strong bones.”
So they knit and they knit and they knit. Then the brunette pops a pill. The other two gasp.
“It’s OK,” the brunette says. “This is just vitamin C. I want my baby to have a strong immune system.”
So they knit and they knit and they knit. Then the blonde pops a pill. The other two gasp.
“It’s OK,” the blonde says. “This is just thalidomide. I can’t get the arms on this sweater right.”
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Gorilla Pranks Lion: Jungle’s Wildest Tale!
A gorilla spots a lion bent over a stream taking a drink. He sneaks up behind him, does his thing, and takes off running. Furious, the lion chases him through the jungle.
The gorilla gets ahead and runs into a safari camp, quickly throws on some khakis, grabs a newspaper, and sits by the fire pretending to read.
Moments later, the lion bursts into camp, roaring, “Did anyone see a gorilla run through here?”
Without looking up, the gorilla says, “You mean the one that fucked the lion up the ass?”
The lion gasps, “Oh my god! It’s in the paper already?!”
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Say fuck at the same time
How do you get 29 nice old ladies to say fuck at the same time?
Have the 30th nice old lady say, “Bingo!” -
Well, that didn’t work
My wife and I were discussing our eventual deaths…
I said my worst fear was dying alone, and that I wanted the last thing I hear to be her telling me she loves me.
She gave me a big hug, said, “I love you,” and then waited.
After a couple of seconds, she shook her head and said, “Well, that didn’t work.”
