Format: setup-punchline

Setup-punchline comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Spilled Lemonade

    What did Adolf Hitler do when he spilled his lemonade all over the table?

    He wiped off the “Juice.”

  • Sound Advice

    My granddad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed.

    “It’s worth spending money on good speakers,” he told me.

  • Why Don’t Blind People Like to Skydive?

    Why don’t blind people like to skydive?

    Because it scares the dog.

  • Johnny Uses ‘Urinate’ in a Sentence

    Little Johnny was in class, and his teacher was going through a list of words to have each student use in a sentence.

    As she got closer to Johnny, she began to regret her decision. His word was “urinate,” and she really didn’t want to give it to him.

    The teacher asked, “Who wants the next one?”

    Little Johnny’s hand was waving in the air while no one else responded.

    Defeated, the teacher said, “Okay, Johnny, your word is ‘urinate.’”

    Little Johnny thought for a moment, then said, “My dad says you’re an eight, but if you had bigger tits, you’d be a ten.”

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  • I didn’t think it hurt that much

    I said to my wife, “They say that childbirth is the most painful thing someone can experience…”
    “Now, maybe I was too young to remember, but I didn’t think it hurt that much.”

  • Those are just contractions

    A woman in labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”
    “Don’t worry,” said the doctor. “Those are just contractions.”

  • He gave me a blank stair

    When I told my contractor that I didn’t want any carpeted steps, he just gave me a blank stair.

  • Toast the bride and groom

    Two slices of bread got married.
    The wedding was amazing, until someone decided to toast the bride and groom.

  • Now they have cameras everywhere

    When I was young, you could go to the grocery store with two dollars in your pocket and come out with a loaf of bread, two dozen eggs, and a pound of butter.
    Now, they have cameras everywhere.

  • I turned a few heads

    I walked down the street dressed as a screwdriver.
    I turned a few heads.