Format: setup-punchline

Setup-punchline comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • She Can Only Fasten 8

    The teacher asked her students to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.

    Mary said, “My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating.”

    The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted the word ‘fascinate’.”

    Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated.”

    The teacher said, “Good, but I wanted the word ‘fascinate’.”

    Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was noted for his bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate” so she called on him.

    Johnny said, “My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten 8.”

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  • You Could At Least Give It a Try

    “Dad,” said Little Johnny, “I’m late for football practice. Would you please do my homework for me?”

    Little Johnny’s father said irately, “Son, it just wouldn’t be right.”

    “That’s okay,” replied Little Johnny, “You could at least give it a try, couldn’t you?”

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  • I Think He Wants to Buy Mom

    Lil’ Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horses’ legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, “Pop, why are you doing that?”

    “Because I’m thinking of buying these horses.”

    Johnny looked worried, “Then I think we’d better hurry home right away!”

    “Why?” his father asked.

    “Because the milkman stopped by yesterday, and I think he wants to buy Mom!”

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  • I Am Sorry Youre So Ugly

    Little Johnny said to his aunt Tess: “My God, you’re ugly, aren’t you!”

    His mother overheard this and pulled Johnny into the kitchen. “You naughty boy!”, she screamed, “How can you say to your aunt that she’s ugly! You go right in and apologise to her! Tell her you’re sorry!”

    Little Johnny entered the living room, walked over to his aunt and said: “Aunt Tess, I am sorry you’re so ugly”

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  • I Feel Like a Baby

    Tim, Joe and Steve, life long friends, were down at the local tavern having a beer celebrating Steve’s 80th birthday.

    Steve grabbed his shoulder and said, “You know, I’m 80 and I can feel the aches and pains of my age.”

    Tim agreed, saying he can tell rain is coming by the aches in his knees.

    Joe shook his head. “Guys,” he said. “I feel like a baby.”

    Tim and Steve looked at each other, puzzled.

    Joey took a sip of beer and smiled. “I got no hair, no teeth and I pee my pants a lot!”

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  • Ive Never Seen a Smaller Dick in My Life

    A man goes to a urologist.

    Urologist: “Sir, please take off your pants and underpants”.

    The man does so.

    Urologist: “I’m warning you, this is going to hurt”.

    The man says that he’s ready.

    Urologist, laughing: “I’ve never seen a smaller dick in my life!”

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  • Race Who Comes First

    Race Who Comes First

    WHENEVER I HAVE SEX, IT’S A RACE TO SEE WHO COMES FIRST.

    ME OR THE POLICE.

  • Nose Be 12 Inches

    Nose Be 12 Inches

    WHY CAN’T A NOSE BE 12 INCHES?

    BECAUSE THEN IT WOULD BE A FOOT.

  • All I Smell Is Molasses

    A mole family was living in their mole hole: a daddy mole, a momma mole, and a baby mole.

    They were just about to eat dinner when an overpowering smell wafted down the hole.

    The daddy mole rushes to the entrance and says, “Mmmm, I smell strawberries!”

    Momma mole runs beside him and says, “Ohhh, I smell blueberries!”

    Baby mole tries to stick his head out of the hole, but is stuck behind them, and says, “All I smell is molasses!”

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  • I Knew Where He Lived

    I scared the mailman yesterday by going to the door completely naked…

    I’m not sure what freaked him out more… my naked body or the fact that I knew where he lived.