While not well documented, I’d imagine there has to be *someone* of renown whose famous last words were “OHHHHH SHIT!!!”
Meh Thoughts
-
If I were that famed limerick guy from Nantucket, I’d have made a lucrative career for
If I were that famed limerick guy from Nantucket, I’d have made a lucrative career for myself in the adult entertainment industry. But I’d probably still do that other thing, too.
-
Well, I killed my own grandfather and here I am!
Well, I killed my own grandfather and here I am! Guess there’s no paradox when time travel isn’t involved.
-
I’m not on the award committee or anything, but I can pretty much guarantee a Nobel
I’m not on the award committee or anything, but I can pretty much guarantee a Nobel Prize to any scientist who makes cauliflower taste like bacon.
-
Whenever I see that painting “The Scream,” I try to imagine that the man is wearing
Whenever I see that painting “The Scream,” I try to imagine that the man is wearing earphones and singing, because that way it looks like he’s having fun.
-
I don’t like to tell potential employers I was downsized from my last job, because that
I don’t like to tell potential employers I was downsized from my last job, because that makes me seem like a loser who couldn’t adapt to the changing business environment. So I tell them instead that I quit to spend more quality time with my kitty cats.
-
A bad day of skydiving is better than…
A bad day of skydiving is better than… No, come to think of it, a bad day of skydiving could be *really* bad. Okay then, a bad day of skydiving that’s not so bad as to involve ambulances is better than a good day at work.
-
I was sitting in my kitchen last night when I realized that if the next pope is a really
I was sitting in my kitchen last night when I realized that if the next pope is a really tall guy, his pope hat will brush the ceiling if he ever comes to visit me.
-
Until HR helped me clear things up, I had always assumed the sexual harassment clock
Until HR helped me clear things up, I had always assumed the sexual harassment clock didn’t start until *after* the job interview.
-
They just busted a prostitution ring that was run from an auto junkyard.
They just busted a prostitution ring that was run from an auto junkyard. I’ll bet they had a self-service area where you could pull your own parts.
