Cats aren’t so damn superior. Heck, you can easily hypnotize one by dangling a shiny object in front of its eyes and giving it tuna… giving it tuna… must give the cat some tuna….
Meh Thoughts
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Rare Medium Well: A Steak Pun Delight!
A steak pun is a rare medium well done.
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It’s tough being on the road so much, away from my wife and
It’s tough being on the road so much, away from my wife and family. However, it helps me to listen to Journey’s “Faithfully” while I’m driving one home in the Motel 6 cleaning lady.
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My wife and I just love experimenting in the kitchen! Last week
My wife and I just love experimenting in the kitchen! Last week we tried deviled eggs flavored with orange zest and Thai sriracha sauce. The week before that I banged her on the top dishwasher rack while she shoved a wire whisk up my ass.
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Dildos need a tagline, for marketing purposes. My suggestion:
Dildos need a tagline, for marketing purposes. My suggestion: “The gift that keeps on getting.”
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Inflation Joke
Last year, I had a great joke about inflation.
But it’s hardly worth it now. -
I went to a christening and now everyone is mad at me.
I went to a christening and now everyone is mad at me. In my defense, it was the first one I ever attended, and I never would’ve thought it would take me that many swings to break a champagne bottle over an infant’s head.
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It’s all fun and games till my boyfriend cums on my tits and
It’s all fun and games till my boyfriend cums on my tits and another girl licks it off. Then it’s… Whoa, weird — it’s still fun and games. Win!
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Your Chance of Getting Hit by Lightning
It’s silly to worry about storms.
Your chance of getting hit by lightning is exactly the same as your chance of getting hit by lightning.
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The fastest land mammal is a toddler who’s been asked what’s in their mouth.
The fastest land mammal is a toddler who’s been asked what’s in their mouth.
