My granddad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed.
“It’s worth spending money on good speakers,” he told me.
Meh Thoughts
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Not a Big Fan
I hate it when people call me a windmill.
I’m not a big fan.
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*I* believe the children are our furniture.
*I* believe the children are our furniture.
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At this point Pope John Paul II’s beatification looks pretty much assured — barring
At this point Pope John Paul II’s beatification looks pretty much assured — barring allegations of steroid use, of course.
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Vomit is simply nature’s way of allowing children who are too young to speak to let you
Vomit is simply nature’s way of allowing children who are too young to speak to let you know they don’t like the carpeting.
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Wife’s Anatomy: Not What I Expected
My wife says it’s okay to have a little penis. I still wish she didn’t have one, though.
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If only Africa had more mosquito nets
If only Africa had more mosquito nets, then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of AIDS.
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I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, but that’s only
I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, but that’s only because he’s probably heard it his entire life and I don’t want him to feel bad.
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She Never Listened to Me
I had to break up with my deaf girlfriend.
She never listened to me.
