People who make broad generalizations are always wrong.
Meh Thoughts
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Not What It Looks Like
So a girl walks in and catches her boyfriend masturbating to an optical illusion. “What the hell are you doing?” she screams.
And he says, “Honey, it’s not what it looks like.”
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Something must be fu#$ed up with my Life Alert notifications.
Something must be fu#$ed up with my Life Alert notifications. I keep getting messages from Keith Richards saying he’s out of Jack Daniel’s.
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Achieving a Smoking Hot Body: Cremation Humor!
I’ve decided that cremation is the only way I’m going to get a smoking hot body.
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I Just Don’t See It
My friend thinks that a woman in camouflage is really sexy.
I just don’t see it.
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Shoe: The Sneezing Leather Mystery!
What’s made out of leather and sounds like a sneeze?
A Shoe! -
Self-defense tip: If you’re ever about to be mugged by a couple of clowns, don’t
Self-defense tip: If you’re ever about to be mugged by a couple of clowns, don’t hesitate — go for the juggler.
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I’ll bet Popeye named his pecker “Pimiento
I’ll bet Popeye named his pecker “Pimiento.”
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Snails Without Their Shells
You’d think snails would be faster without their shells.
But they’re actually a bit more sluggish.
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People often wonder how I climbed the corporate ladder so
People often wonder how I climbed the corporate ladder so quickly. Personally, I think it’s due to my ignoring my career counselor’s advice and refusing to remove “fellatio expert” from my resume.
