Tone: dark humor

Dark humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Officer Down

    Officer Down

  • Spread The Mayonnaise

    Spread The Mayonnaise

  • Starbucks Recycle Landfill

    Starbucks Recycle Landfill

  • Goodbye You Little Shit

    Goodbye You Little Shit

  • Calories In Semen

    Calories In Semen

  • Why Is the Bible Like a Penis

    Why is the Bible like a penis?

    You get it forced down your throat by a priest.

  • Diet Lost 14 Days Happiness

    Diet Lost 14 Days Happiness

  • Fast Deer

    Fast Deer

  • At Least He Let Go of Ol Zeek

    Here in Kentucky, you don’t see too many people hang-gliding. Ol’ Zeek decided to save up and get a hang-glider. He takes it to the highest mountain, and after struggling to the top, he gets ready to take flight. He takes off running and reaches the edge–into the wind he goes!

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    Meanwhile, Maw & Paw Hicks were sittin’ on the porch swing talkin’ bout the good ol’ days when Maw spots the biggest bird she ever seen!

    “Look at the size of that bird, Paw!” she exclaims.

    Paw raises up, “Git my gun, Maw.”

    She runs into the house, brings out his pump shotgun.

    He takes careful aim. BANG…BANG…..BANG…..BANG! The monster size bird continues to sail silently over the tree tops.

    “I think ya missed him, Paw,” she says.

    “Yeah,” he replies, “but at least he let go of ol’ Zeek!”

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  • A Good Sheepll Do That

    Well, a couple months back there was this trial in the West Virginia courts. A man was being tried for fornicating with a sheep, since that’s illegal an’ all. Anyway, the key witness was an old fella who was walking along the highway by the farm where the sheep was raised.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    The prosecutor asked the witness what he saw: “Well, I was walkin’ along, and saw this sheep just’a eatin’ grass. And then this fella walks up from behind the sheep, real quiet-like.”

    “And then what?” asked the prosecutor.

    “Then he unbuckled his belt, and pulled the sheep close.”

    “And what happened after that?”

    “Well,” said the witness, “they sorta shook for a couple of minutes. THEN, afterwards, the sheep turned around… an’ licked him!”

    Just then one of the members of the jury leaned over to the jury member next to him and said, “You know… a good sheep’ll do that.”

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