Tone: dark

Dark jokes, grim memes, and humor with the lights off and the judgment missing from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Finishing Each Others Sentences

    Finishing Each Others Sentences

    Love is… Finishing each other’s sentences.

  • Mothers Day Lowest Crime

    Mothers Day Lowest Crime

    Fin @gofinurself

    My mom is a prosecutor and every year she brings up the fact that Mother’s Day is the day with the lowest crime. I think that says a lot about how many moms commit crimes throughout the year, but can’t today because they’re too busy being celebrated.

  • Dark Side of the Force

    Dark Side of the Force

    Meth user fights off 15 police officers ‘while masturbating in bar’

    Metro News Reporter Tuesday 31 Dec 2013

    The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural.

  • Medicinal Pizza

    Medicinal Pizza

    When the doctor asks what you’re taking for depression

    6 Medicinal Pizza

  • Abortion Is a Difficult Topic

    Abortion Is a Difficult Topic

    What is your opinion on abortion?

    Abortion is a difficult topic for me.

    On the one hand I support it because it kills children.

    On the other hand, it gives women a choice.

  • The Rabbi’s Advice

    A guy goes to his rabbi to ask his advice.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    “Rabbi, I have a court case next week. What should I wear? Should I wear shabby clothes and hope the judge has pity on me, or should I wear my best suit, give some money to the judge and say, ‘You look after me and I’ll look after you’?”

    “Well, my son. You remember how my daughter got married only last week? So, the night before, she came to me with a question: ‘What should I wear that night? The short, see-through negligee my sister gave me, or the long thick nightie mother gave me?’”

    “And the answer I gave her is the answer I give you: It doesn’t matter what you wear — you’re going to get fucked.”

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  • Polly’s Tree Climbing

    Polly went home happy and told her mum how she’d earned $50 by climbing a tree.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    Her mum replied, “Sweetie — they just wanted to see your knickers.”

    To which Polly replied, “No, look, Mom, I was clever, I took them off!”

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  • Superman’s Drinking Problem

    A man walks into a bar on the top floor of a skyscraper and orders a cold beer.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    As he’s sipping it, he suddenly watches the guy next to him stroll over to the window… and jump right out!

    “Good grief! Did you see that?! That man just jumped out the window!”

    The bartender doesn’t even blink.

    Shaken, the man takes another sip.

    A minute later, the same guy walks back in, sits down, orders another drink, finishes it, and jumps out the window again.

    The man shouts, “Are you kidding me?! He did it again!”

    Still, the bartender says nothing.

    The guy comes back into the bar and orders another drink.

    Finally, the man asks, “How on earth are you surviving those jumps?”

    The guy grins and says, “Oh, it’s this special drink. If you finish it fast enough, you can float.”

    Excited, the man orders the same “floatie” drink, chugs it, runs to the window, jumps out… and SPLAT — straight onto the sidewalk.

    The bartender sighs and says, “Superman… you’re a real jerk when you’ve been drinking.”

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  • Gram of Coke and a Pepsi

    Gram of Coke and a Pepsi

    I’d like a Pepsi.

    We have Coke.

    OK, I’ll take a gram of that and a Pepsi.

  • Deaf Kid Orgy

    Deaf Kid Orgy

    Me and the boys: *putting up random hand gang signs in class*

    The deaf kid wondering why we’re planning an orgy with the class pet: