When the hooker you just drowned still has another 10 minutes you paid for
made with mematic
Tone: shocking
Shocking humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
-
Who Fucks the Stork
Two-year-old little Johnnie was being bounced up and down on his grandad’s knee when he suddenly asked, “Gwandad, where do babies come fwom?”
Grandad was a bit shocked and thought a bit: he then said, “Why my boy, they come from the stork.”
After about two minutes little Johnnie said, “Gwandad… who fucks the stork?”
-
What Sound Does a Pig Make
A primary school teacher in the Bronx decided to see how many of the city kids knew what sounds farm animals made. She asked the kids to put their hands up if they knew the correct sound. “Who knows what sound a cow makes?” she asked.
Mary put her hand up and said “Moooo!”
“Very good” replied the teacher, “what sound do sheep make?”
“Maaaa” answered Johnny.
She continued this for a while. Then she asked “What sound does a pig make?”
All the hands in the class went up. She was surprised at the response. She chose the shy little boy at the back of the class. He stood up, took a deep breath, and screamed “Up against the wall mutha-fucka!!”
-
Blind Man Husband Home
It’s my first time with a blind man!
You’ll like it!
Dear god! My husband is home! Hide under the bed!
Honey! You’re home early!
-
Family Racist
SADLY LEARNED MY FAMILY WAS RACIST. I DATED A BLACK GIRL AND BROUGHT HER HOME TO MEET THE THEM.
MY WIFE AND KIDS WOULDN’T EVEN TALK TO HER.
-
Shot 38 Times Suicide
HEAR ABOUT THAT BLACK GUY WHO WAS SHOT 38 TIMES?
WORST CASE OF SUICIDE WE’VE EVER SEEN
-
Walter Summerford Lightning
A man named Walter Summerford was struck by lightening 3 times in his life. After his death, his gravestone was also struck.
Jesus Christ!
FUCK THAT GUY
-
Jew In Oven
Carryout Orders:
76 LINDSEY – Now – Ready
78 MARTIN SCHMIDT – Now – Ready
79 LYNN MURRAY – Now – Ready
81 JEW – 4 minutes – In Oven
-
Coronavirus Squirrel Ass
Coronavirus panic day 3: I was forced to catch a squirrel today, not for food, I just used it to wipe my ass… It was not happy
