GODDAMMIT PAUL SIMON ARE YOU A ROCK OR ARE YOU AN ISLAND? MAKE UP YOUR FUCKING MIND!
Tone: witty
Witty humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Regarding being accused of masturbating in the shower: I can
Regarding being accused of masturbating in the shower: I can tell you that the fact my wife’s conditioner looks like semen has bailed me out on more than one occasion.
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Dance in the School for the Blind’s talent show like nobody’s
Dance in the School for the Blind’s talent show like nobody’s watching.
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“GIVE ME MORE BALLS!” -me, playing this Arkanoid game
“GIVE ME MORE BALLS!” -me, playing this Arkanoid game
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These funeral ushers are not fucking around with the one free
These funeral ushers are not fucking around with the one free balloon per mourner limit.
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Why do they call them potholes, man? You can’t blame bud for
Why do they call them potholes, man? You can’t blame bud for that shit. *massive bong rip*
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Fuck it: Mouses, deers, fishes, gooses. There, I did it. It’s
Fuck it: Mouses, deers, fishes, gooses. There, I did it. It’s about time someone did.
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I can’t believe how spicy this peppered Italian salami is! I
I can’t believe how spicy this peppered Italian salami is! I could only get it halfway up my ass before I gave up.
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Is “gangbang” one word or two? I’m writing a letter to try and
Is “gangbang” one word or two? I’m writing a letter to try and get out of jury duty and I don’t wanna sound stupid.
