Location is everything. A three-hole punch on an office printer table: mundane. A three-hole punch on an S&M; buffet table: nasty.
Delivery Style: comparative
Comparative joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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(Amy Peterson) You can assume the cantina’s hot sauce is going
(Amy Peterson) You can assume the cantina’s hot sauce is going to do a number on your sphincter when you hear Johnny Cash’s “Ring of Fire” playing in the waiting area.
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Money may be the root of all evil, but guys with tiny dicks are
Money may be the root of all evil, but guys with tiny dicks are a pretty close second.
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(Tim H. Richweis) The biggest difference between my clitoris and
(Tim H. Richweis) The biggest difference between my clitoris and Osama bin Laden is that a guy actually found Osama bin Laden.
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I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, I’m just saying I
I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, I’m just saying I should probably be able to tell the difference between fucking and acupuncture.
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When she said was into leather and chains, I bought her a Harley
When she said was into leather and chains, I bought her a Harley riding jacket. When she said she liked watersports, I naively showed up with my snorkel. So today when she told me she had some shit to do around the house, I decided to stay away altogether, just in case.
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Whew, thank goodness Week Without Showering is over! I was
Whew, thank goodness Week Without Showering is over! I was feeling pretty scummy. Not as scummy as Week Without Wiping, but still.
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“Slowly Encroaching Chocolate” is a level on Candy Crush Saga.
“Slowly Encroaching Chocolate” is a level on Candy Crush Saga. It’s also a pretty fair descriptor for the state of my underwear.
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If I could be young again, I’d become a Flamenco dancer. High
If I could be young again, I’d become a Flamenco dancer. High school beatings only last four years, but I’d have decades of pussy.
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The best things about sleeping with women: their softness, their
The best things about sleeping with women: their softness, their warmth and their inability to poke me in the ass with a boner.
