Delivery Style: observational
Observational joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Kicking ass in the America’s Cup
A life-size Noah’s Ark is open to the public. I’m not sure if I believe the story about the ark kicking ass in the America’s Cup yacht races.
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Now they have cameras everywhere
When I was young, you could go to the grocery store with two dollars in your pocket and come out with a loaf of bread, two dozen eggs, and a pound of butter.
Now, they have cameras everywhere. -
Something’s messed up in the first place
They say that if you look at the sun too long, it can fry your brain. But the way I figure it is that if you look at the sun long enough to fry your brain, something’s messed up in the first place.
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If your patio cushions were getting wet
I bet those thunderstorm relaxation CDs wouldn’t be as restful if you actually lived deep in the rainforest and had to constantly fight off the urge to get up and check if your patio furniture cushions were getting wet.
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Butterflies in my stomach
I’d never make it on one of those “Survivor” shows. Every time I think about eating something like caterpillars, I start to get butterflies in my stomach.
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Souble Standards
When I’m sitting in a restaurant with a date and she asks, “Do you mind if I smoke?” I always feel like saying, “No, but do you mind if I sit here beside you and discreetly masturbate under the tablecloth?”
Regrettably, I never do, since by the time she gets around to asking about the cigarette, I’m usually half finished and have no intention of stopping anyway.
