Setup Punchline Jokes, Memes & Dark Humor

Hold the Ladder: Last Words of Wisdom

I’ll never forget my granddad’s last words to me before he died:
“Are you still holding the ladder?”

What is in a ghost’s nose?
Boo-gers.

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
He’s all right now.

My first time using an elevator was an uplifting experience.
The second time let me down.

I thought my wife was joking when she said she’d leave me if I didn’t stop singing “I’m a Believer.”
Then I saw her face.

Why do scuba divers fall backward into the water?
Because if they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat.

Why can’t a bicycle stand on its own?
It’s two-tired.

My wife took everything from me in the divorce. Including my expensive shoes.
She has sole custody.

My grief councillor died last week.

Luckily for me, though, he was very good at his job, because I really don’t give a shit.

Did you hear about the guitar that aroused people when played?

It had to be put on the sexy Fenders register.