Rodney Lacroix @RodLacroix
Child: The Tooth Fairy left me three dollars!
Me: When I was a kid the Tooth Fairy would leave us coins.
Child: Were they made of wood?
Me:
Child:
Me: The Tooth Fairy isn’t real.
5:36 AM · 7/26/20 · Twitter for iPad
Format: screenshot
Screenshot comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
-
Jew In Oven
Carryout Orders:
76 LINDSEY – Now – Ready
78 MARTIN SCHMIDT – Now – Ready
79 LYNN MURRAY – Now – Ready
81 JEW – 4 minutes – In Oven
-
Send To Back Bus
Cut Copy Paste Change Picture… Group Bring to Front Send to Back Hyperlink… Save as Picture… Size and Position… Send to Back Send Backward
-
Toilet Paper Cardboard
Runs out of toilet paper
Helpful redditors: This poor fella is doing it all wrong. Ya just stick the cardboard roll up your ass and poop thru the tube so no shit ever touches your butthole.
My genius has come alive.
-
KFC 11 Herbs Spices
The KFC twitter account only follows 11 people. The 5 spice girls and 6 guys named herb. This is because of their secret blend of 11 herbs and spices. The first person to notice and point this out was sent a painting of himself holding a drumstick while riding piggyback on the Colonel.
YUP
-
Trump Shakira Hot
Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump
That Shakira is hot. If only they all looked like that. Open borders baby.
-
Die Positive Surroundings
The doctor said if i can’t find a new way to relate more positively to my surroundings, I’m going to die.
I’m going to die.
