Joke Type: dark humor

Dark humor jokes, grim punchlines, and comedy from the questionable end of the emotional buffet from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.

  • Only 90s Kids Remember This

    Only 90s Kids Remember This

    ONLY 90’s KIDS REMEMBER THIS

  • Black Monopoly

    Black Monopoly

    BLACK MONOPOLY

    COMMUNITY CHEST CHANCE GO TO JAIL JAIL GO TO JAIL

  • Finishing Each Others Sentences

    Finishing Each Others Sentences

    Love is… Finishing each other’s sentences.

  • Mothers Day Lowest Crime

    Mothers Day Lowest Crime

    Fin @gofinurself

    My mom is a prosecutor and every year she brings up the fact that Mother’s Day is the day with the lowest crime. I think that says a lot about how many moms commit crimes throughout the year, but can’t today because they’re too busy being celebrated.

  • Dark Side of the Force

    Dark Side of the Force

    Meth user fights off 15 police officers ‘while masturbating in bar’

    Metro News Reporter Tuesday 31 Dec 2013

    The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural.

  • Abortion Is a Difficult Topic

    Abortion Is a Difficult Topic

    What is your opinion on abortion?

    Abortion is a difficult topic for me.

    On the one hand I support it because it kills children.

    On the other hand, it gives women a choice.

  • That Moth Had a Big Cock

    I was driving along with my young son when we noticed a car driving erratically ahead of us. As we pulled alongside it, ready to overtake, the window came down and a massive dildo — sixteen inches if it was a day — came flying out the window and smacked into our windscreen before flying off to the curb side.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    My son looked confused for a second before asking, “What was that, Dad?”

    I had to think quick. “That was a moth,” I replied. “Just a moth.”

    He thought about it for a while and said, “Fuck, that moth had a big cock, eh Dad!”

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  • Minty Fresh Brains

    I’ve made provisions in my will to be buried with a roll of breath mints. I figure if I should somehow become part of a zombie army roaming the earth, I may want something minty fresh to take the taste of brains out of my mouth.

  • The Rabbi’s Advice

    A guy goes to his rabbi to ask his advice.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    “Rabbi, I have a court case next week. What should I wear? Should I wear shabby clothes and hope the judge has pity on me, or should I wear my best suit, give some money to the judge and say, ‘You look after me and I’ll look after you’?”

    “Well, my son. You remember how my daughter got married only last week? So, the night before, she came to me with a question: ‘What should I wear that night? The short, see-through negligee my sister gave me, or the long thick nightie mother gave me?’”

    “And the answer I gave her is the answer I give you: It doesn’t matter what you wear — you’re going to get fucked.”

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  • Gram of Coke and a Pepsi

    Gram of Coke and a Pepsi

    I’d like a Pepsi.

    We have Coke.

    OK, I’ll take a gram of that and a Pepsi.