There I was, twisted up in an erotic sexual pose, while at the same time lamenting the deeds of my past and wondering what punishment I might have to suffer in the future. Alas, such is the paradox of my religion, the Karma Sutra.
Joke Type: misdirection
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I’m not sure who to call — the patent office? Not to show my
I’m not sure who to call — the patent office? Not to show my hand too soon, but I think I figured out a cheap and easy way to make wet tissues at home.
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My boyfriend loves getting my titty pics on his cell phone. The
My boyfriend loves getting my titty pics on his cell phone. The dude in line in front of him at Starbucks doesn’t like it nearly as much, though.
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Those taking the similes quiz at home will remember we asked you
Those taking the similes quiz at home will remember we asked you to finish the following: a) As old as _____. b) As heavy as _____. c) As cold as _____. The correct answers are as follows: a) shit. b) shit. c) fuck.
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I like using the iPhone to send pictures of myself totally nude
I like using the iPhone to send pictures of myself totally nude to my boyfriend, but the lighting in these Apple stores sucks.
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I could’ve sworn my boss said he was going to give me a big
I could’ve sworn my boss said he was going to give me a big bonus for Christmas this year. And the BONER he gave me wasn’t even that big.
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But in the end, it’s always my dick that somehow ends up
But in the end, it’s always my dick that somehow ends up grabbing my attention. (Jim Woodruff My new girlfriend is the sexiest woman in the world: big firm breasts, gorgeous eyes and lips, luscious curving hips, long and thick peni– hey, wait just a fucking minute! Oh, my god. I can’t believe this! She totally forgot to wish me a happy one-week anniversary!
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I am routinely disgusted upon seeing my wife’s issues of
I am routinely disgusted upon seeing my wife’s issues of “Fitness” and “Shape” magazines, with scantily attired women adorning the cover. I mean, they *always* find a way to put the damn mailing label on top of the cameltoe!
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I’m going to get a dog and name it MyRack. Then I can walk
I’m going to get a dog and name it MyRack. Then I can walk around the neighborhood yelling, “Has anyone seen MyRack?” and see which guys dare to answer.
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Now that I’m done with my busy season at work, I’m ready to
Now that I’m done with my busy season at work, I’m ready to resume churning out
