Observational jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
We will never forget these unforgettable lines from some legendary 70’s movies
I love the smell of napalm in the morning! — Robert Duvall
You’re gonna need a bigger boat. — Roy Scheider
GO AHEAD MAKE MY DAY! — Clint Eastwood
ghag gagh gaagh ghaagh gaagh gaargh — Linda Lovelace
If your weekend didn’t end like this don’t waste your breath tellin me about it.
When you’re trying to wash the stink off of your sex toy.
When the grand kids are playing fortnite but you’re upstairs playing tomb raider
If a Woman Needs It, Should She Be Spanked?
[Today’s question by Herman Merlin, 125 Broad St. New York 4, N. Y.]
MIGUEL MATOS, Brooklyn, counterman: “Why not? If they don’t know how to behave by the time they’re adults, they should be treated like children and spanked. That ought to make them grow up in a hurry. If it doesn’t at first, they’ll soon get the idea.”
FRANK DESIDERIO, Brooklyn, barber: “Yes, when they deserve it. As a barber, I’ve got a lot of faith in the hairbrush. I think there are certain cases when it is advisable. When it is, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t go right ahead and do it. I can’t knock the idea. In my business, a man sets a lot of store by the results he can get with a hairbrush properly applied.”
TEDDY GALLEI, Brooklyn, parking lot attendant: “You bet. It teaches them who’s boss. A lot of women tend to forget this is a man’s world and a lot of men who stepped down as boss of a family wish they hadn’t. Spanking might help get back some of the respect they lost.”
WILLIAM DAVIS, Brooklyn, toy factory owner: “Yes. Most of them have it coming to them anyway. If they don’t, it will remind them how well off they are. I subscribe to the theory that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”
My new standing desk has arrived, it has a cool feature bolted on underneath.
Kids today have it too easy, all they have to do is click to watch a midget fuck a goat. We had to buy a goat and capture a midget.
I NOTICED MY WAITRESS HAS A BLACK EYE
SO I ORDERED VERY SLOWLY BECAUSE SHE OBVIOUSLY DOESN’T LISTEN.
