The old song says, “One is the loneliest number you could ever do.” I don’t know about you, but I’d much rather be alone when I’m doing number two.
Sensitivity: PG-13
Pg-13 humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Five Million Dollar Savings Account
A man walks into a bank.
Goes up to the teller and says, “I’d like to open a damn savings account.”
The teller says, “Sir, I’d be happy to help you, but this is a place of business — you can’t swear here.”
The man replies, “I don’t care, just let me open a damn savings account.”
The teller says, “Sir, that’s just inappropriate. If you keep talking to me that way I’ll have to get the manager.”
The man says, “Why won’t you just open the damn savings account?”
So the teller goes and gets the manager — he comes out and says, “Alright sir, I understand you’re swearing at my employee — what seems to be the problem here?”
The man says, “I don’t have a problem — I just won 5 million dollars in the lottery and I want to open up a damn savings account!”
The manager looks at the teller and back at the man and says, “And this motherfucker wouldn’t let you?”
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Service Dog Drug Dog
Switching jobs from service dog to drug sniffing dog is the best decision I ever made. Oh yeah, woof, or something.
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Cowboy Architects Towns
I BELIEVE A LOT OF CONFLICT IN THE WILD WEST COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED
IF COWBOY ARCHITECTS HAD JUST MADE THEIR TOWNS BIG ENOUGH FOR EVERYONE
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Robin Hood Strength
Robin Hood: *Gives stolen gold to little boy*
Little Kid: Thank you I’m rich now!
Robin Hood:
I know what I have to do but I don’t know if I have the strength to do it.
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Lords Spaghetti
My psalms are sweaty knees weak, cross is heavy
last supper is ready it’s lord’s spaghetti
