Sure, I robbed that bank. I heard that cute bank teller fingered lots of suspects in the past.
Sensitivity: PG-13
Pg-13 humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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I hate dating a pharmacist. He always puts stickers on me
I hate dating a pharmacist. He always puts stickers on me saying, “Not to be taken orally.”
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(b0nrmunky) When I got exhausted keeping up with my girlfriend’s
(b0nrmunky) When I got exhausted keeping up with my girlfriend’s desire for sex, she suggested bringing other guys into the bedroom to help, and I agreed. The problem is that she goes through so many of them, I get exhausted just watching.
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I made the mistake of shopping for a new bed with my wife. While
I made the mistake of shopping for a new bed with my wife. While the salesperson was more than happy to indulge her questions about “plushness” and “comfort,” all I received was blank stares when I voiced concerns about the bedframe’s durability when I’m ramming it home.
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to be on top tonight because that last dump made me a full two
to be on top tonight because that last dump made me a full two pounds lighter.
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Funny, you’d think my boyfriend would’ve been *more* aroused
Funny, you’d think my boyfriend would’ve been *more* aroused when I emerged from the bathroom naked, purring that I wanted
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After watching a porn movie, I can never recall the entire plot
After watching a porn movie, I can never recall the entire plot — I just remember a few snatches.
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The best things about sleeping with women: their softness, their
The best things about sleeping with women: their softness, their warmth and their inability to poke me in the ass with a boner.
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I don’t really find back of the neck tattoos attractive on a
I don’t really find back of the neck tattoos attractive on a woman, but I do appreciate having something to read during sex — so thanks, ladies!
