Sensitivity: Questionable

Questionable humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Johnny Uses ‘Urinate’ in a Sentence

    Little Johnny was in class, and his teacher was going through a list of words to have each student use in a sentence.

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    As she got closer to Johnny, she began to regret her decision. His word was “urinate,” and she really didn’t want to give it to him.

    The teacher asked, “Who wants the next one?”

    Little Johnny’s hand was waving in the air while no one else responded.

    Defeated, the teacher said, “Okay, Johnny, your word is ‘urinate.’”

    Little Johnny thought for a moment, then said, “My dad says you’re an eight, but if you had bigger tits, you’d be a ten.”

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  • Nope — I Slept With Your Wife

    A man walks into a bar.

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    The bartender asks, “Why the long face?”

    The man replies, “I just found out my wife is sleeping with another man. I’ve decided I’m going to drink myself to death.”

    The bartender looks shocked and says, “I’m sorry, I can’t help you kill yourself.”

    The man asks, “Well, what would you do in my situation?”

    The bartender puffs himself up a bit and says, “If I found out a guy was sleeping with my wife, I wouldn’t sit around feeling sorry for myself. I’d kill the guy.”

    The man jumps up from his stool and shouts, “That’s a great idea! Thanks!” Then he runs out of the bar.

    A couple of hours go by, and the bartender starts to get nervous. Then the man walks back in with a smile on his face.

    “Did you kill the guy?” the bartender asks nervously.

    “Nope,” the man says. “I slept with your wife. Whiskey, please.”

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  • Flying Over 20,000 Feet

    Flying Over 20,000 Feet

    Flying Over 20,000 Feet

  • Why Is My Blonde Girlfriend So Beautiful?

    “Dear God, why is my blonde girlfriend so very beautiful?”

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    God answers, “My son, to make you love her.”

    “But why is she also so very stupid?”

    “My son, to make her love you back.”

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  • Cocaine-Fueled Sharks

    Cocaine-Fueled Sharks

    Cocaine-Fueled Sharks

  • My nose starts pointing skyward

    While I love my renewed confidence now that I had the doctor transfer pubic hair to my bald scalp, the only side effect seems to be that whenever I talk to a pretty girl, my nose starts pointing skyward.

  • The impotent couldn’t come

    We recently opened a shelter for the poor, needy, and the impotent.

    The poor and needy showed up, but the impotent couldn’t come.

  • Check it off my list

    If I ever get arrested for bouncing down my street naked on a pogo stick with a peacock feather in my ass, well, there’s something else I can check off my list of things to do before I die.

  • Ex-Wife’s Comeback: Love Beyond Worn-Out!

    A husband sees his ex-wife on the street. Knowing she remarried, he says, “Hey! How does your new husband like that worn-out old pussy of yours?”

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    And she says, “He likes it just fine, once he gets past the worn-out part.”

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