Sensitivity: Uncensored

Uncensored humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Death by Unga Bunga

    Three explorers crash-land their plane on an uncharted tropical island. The isolationist islanders promptly capture the three survivors and put them on trial for trespassing. Surprisingly, the grand chief of the island speaks broken English.

    “You break harmony on our land,” he says. “There are two punishments for this offense: death, or unga bunga. Choose.” The chief points at the first explorer.

    The first guy chooses unga bunga, because what could be worse than death? Then three islanders step out and drop their loincloths to reveal porn-sized penises. The three islanders then fuck the explorer six ways from Sunday. Once the islanders are spent, the explorer is released.

    The chief then points to the second explorer. “Choose,” he says.

    The second explorer weighs his options. After an excruciating exchange in his own head, he meekly replies, “Unga bunga.”

    Three more islanders drop their loincloths, their penises even bigger than the ones before. They have their way with the second explorer and then release him.

    The chief points at the third explorer. “Choose,” he says.

    “Death,” the explorer replies.

    The chief scratches his chin and reflects. “No one ever choose death before… Death by unga bunga!”

  • Three Tough Rats

    Three rats were sitting around talking. The subject turned to how tough they were.

    The first rat said, “Want to know how tough I am? You know the traps they set out for us? I undo the latch and work out with them.”

    The second rat said, “Want to know how tough I am? You know the poison pellets they set out for us? I chop ’em up with a razor blade and snort it.”

    The third rat starts to leave, and the other two ask him where he’s going.

    The third rat replied, “I’m going upstairs to fuck the cat.”

  • Tight, Isn’t It?

    A man picks up a prostitute and is headed for the motel. She just cannot stop talking about how awesome her pussy is. They get to the motel room and undress.

    To demonstrate, she says to him, “Put a finger in.” He puts a finger in.

    “Put two fingers in.” He puts two fingers in.

    “Put four fingers in.” He does.

    “Put your hand in.” He does.

    “Put your other hand in.” He does.

    “Now, clap!”

    He tries and tries, but cannot clap.

    She says, “Tight, isn’t it?”

  • Nine Volt Battery

    What’s the difference between a nine-volt battery and a butthole?

    Everyone knows not to stick their tongue on a nine-volt battery.

  • Mom Ordered Door Dash Again

    Mom Ordered Door Dash Again

    Oh look, your mom ordered Door Dash again. 😈🤣

    SEMEN

    WTA GAGS.COM

    WGS HI BLOW

  • Nose Grazes the Butt-Clit

    Nose Grazes the Butt-Clit

    When she’s slurping your meat from behind and her nose grazes your butt-clit ever so gently

    I’m gonna squirt!

  • Mellencamp

    Mellencamp

    When the dump is so big you accidentally give yourself a Mellencamp

    mellencamp

    To take a dump so large that the prostate is stimulated and the male ejaculates a little while taking the shit. Called a mellencamp because “it hurts so good.”

  • The Elephant Trunk

    A man goes to the doctor, absolutely desperate. He says, “Doc, I was in a horrible accident and lost my penis. I can’t live like this, you have to help me!”

    The doctor says, “Good news, we have an experimental procedure. We take a baby elephant’s trunk, graft it on, and it works perfectly.”

    The man agrees immediately. The surgery is a success.

    Two months later, the man brings a beautiful woman home for a date. Things start heating up, and suddenly, the man feels a twitch in his pants. The trunk-penis is waking up.

    As they are sitting there, the elephant trunk unzips his fly, creeps onto the table, reaches into the breadbasket, grabs a dinner roll, and disappears back under the table.

    The woman is stunned, her eyes wide.

    “That was… amazing!” she says. “Can you do that again?”

    The guy smiles, wincing in pain, and replies, “I’d love to, but I don’t think I can fit another dinner roll up my ass!”

  • Could You Vape Semen

    Could You Vape Semen

    r/morbidquestions u/thatcatinthecorner 14h

    Could you vape semen?

    If it was watered down to the approximate thickness of fluid, could you vape semen?

    192 60 Share

    BEST COMMENTS

    DrDank7 12h

    Great now you’re making vaping even more gay

    445

    1simis 9h

    It’s a double negative though so it cancels out

    115

    What_R_YOU_Doin_Here 6h

    I don’t think that’s how this works. If you are giving a bj and taking it in the ass at the same time, does that make you straight?

    18

    WillBeamon 6h

    Obviously

    33

  • Cindy the Witch

    A guy goes to a whorehouse, feeling extremely horny. He’s willing to pay big money. The madame realizes that all her girls are currently occupied, but she doesn’t want to lose out on the cash. So she gets an idea.

    She puts a blow-up doll in a darkened room. Then she goes back to the guy and says, “You can have Cindy. She’s very shy and doesn’t speak or react, and she likes to do it with the lights off. But you can do anything you want with her, she won’t complain.”

    The guy pays his money and goes up to the room.

    Ten minutes later he runs back down, naked, screaming, “Cindy’s a witch! Cindy’s a witch!”

    “What’s wrong?” asks the madame.

    “Well, you told me I could do what I like with Cindy, so I thought I’d try some rough stuff!”

    “What happened?”

    “I bit her tit and she flew out the window!”