“It shakes all over like a jellyfish, and I like it, crazy little thing called love.” Wow, Freddie Mercury must’ve been a terrible fuck.
Sensitivity: Uncensored
Uncensored humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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When doing a crossword puzzle and asking the person next to you
When doing a crossword puzzle and asking the person next to you to spell the word “pungent,” make sure you’re not looking up from their vagina.
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My wife claims I’m callous and unsupportive. Apparently she
My wife claims I’m callous and unsupportive. Apparently she missed the chapter in “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” where the Martian phrase “I’m ready to listen” translates roughly, to, “What the fuck crawled up your butt?”
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True love knows no bounds. But it *does* know how to tie you to
True love knows no bounds. But it *does* know how to tie you to the bed and fuck your lights out.
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I think if I were a dude, one of the first things I’d figure out
I think if I were a dude, one of the first things I’d figure out would be how not to cum on my own face when I masturbate.
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Have you ever tried to donkey-punch yourself when jerking off?
Have you ever tried to donkey-punch yourself when jerking off? The toughest part is figuring out which sock puppet gets to do the deed.
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I get it, it’s not “birds of a feather fuck together.” But I’m
I get it, it’s not “birds of a feather fuck together.” But I’m still not canceling the bird orgy.
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When I asked my boyfriend to give me a “shocker,” I wasn’t
When I asked my boyfriend to give me a “shocker,” I wasn’t expecting him to tell me that he fucked my mom.
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Look, I’m not saying I should get all my money back. I know they
Look, I’m not saying I should get all my money back. I know they run a business like everyone, but I still think hookers should at least give premature ejaculators a discount.
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I’m a big fan of suspense movies. I like not knowing whether the
I’m a big fan of suspense movies. I like not knowing whether the hero’s going to squirt on her bush or unload all over those big ol’ titties.
