I thought the elementary school kids might enjoy seeing my collection of giant roosters and stolen cats. But for some strange reason, the principal called me and told me to keep my huge cocks and hot pussies at home.
Tone: Clever
Clever humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Butterflies are free — around the world costs an extra fifty bucks
Butterflies are free — around the world costs an extra fifty bucks.
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When Ben Franklin said, “Early to bed, early to rise,” I think
When Ben Franklin said, “Early to bed, early to rise,” I think it he was talking about the effect of sleep on morning wood.
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Last time I was in Vegas, what I *asked* for was directions to
Last time I was in Vegas, what I *asked* for was directions to the quarter slots. What I ended up with was a two-bit hooker.
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What I did to that hooker last night was so epic, it’ll go down
What I did to that hooker last night was so epic, it’ll go down in the anals of history.
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I am no longer called a serial masturbator since I threw out my
I am no longer called a serial masturbator since I threw out my Cap’n Crunch vibrator.
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Absinthe makes the schlong grow harder
Absinthe makes the schlong grow harder.
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My boyfriend won’t stop staring at me when I brush my teeth. I
My boyfriend won’t stop staring at me when I brush my teeth. I swear I’m never again buying a toothbrush that’s an exact replica of his hard cock.
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(Jilly G.) Who would have guessed that a product called “Kwik
(Jilly G.) Who would have guessed that a product called “Kwik Wood” has nothing to do with erectile dysfunction? Live and learn.
