Tone: ironic

Ironic humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Helen Keller Cat Mittens

    Helen Keller Cat Mittens

    Helen Keller and her beloved cat, ‘Mittens’

  • No Mother Robs Store

    No Mother Robs Store

    NO MOTHER SHOULD HAVE TO FEAR FOR HER SON’S LIFE EVERY TIME HE ROBS A STORE

    RESIST AND !!

  • Back In My Day Hippies

    Back In My Day Hippies

    BaCk iN mY DaY wE WeReN’t sO eAsiLy oFfEndEd

    Back in your day: LONG HAIR IS COMMUNISM STOP HIPPIES MARCH OF THE CHRIST MOVE THEM HIPPIES NORTH

  • Black Republican Committee

    Black Republican Committee

    Did you bring the black guy? No… did you? I thought you had him.

    DURHAM REPUBLICAN PARTY

    BLACK REPUBLICAN COMMITTEE

  • Is That All You People Think About

    Two elderly Jewish men are strolling down the street one day, when they happen to walk by a Catholic church. They see a big sign posted that says, “Convert to Catholicism and get $50.”

    Murray stops and stares at the sign. Abe turns to him and says, “Murray, what’s going on?”

    “Abe,” replies Murray, “I’m thinking of doing it.”

    Abe says, “What are you, crazy?”

    Murray thinks for a minute and says, “Abe, I’m going to do it.”

    With that, Murray strides purposefully into the church and comes out twenty minutes later with his head bowed.

    “So,” asks Abe, “did you convert?”

    “Yes I did,” says Murray.

    “Did you get your fifty dollars?” asks Abe.

    And Murray says, “Is that all you people think about?”

  • Spain and Portugal Fit Like a Glove

    Continental drift is no mere theory; it is fact. Forget about trying to fit Africa and South America together — just look at how Spain’s jagged western border fits Portugal’s jagged eastern border like a glove. Coincidence? Please.

  • The Taxi Driver

    A boy and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town, doing what boys and girls do on back roads some distance from town, when the girl stopped the boy. “I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I’m actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex.”

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    The boy reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing. After the cigarette, the boy just sat in the driver’s seat looking out the window.

    “Why aren’t we going anywhere?” asked the girl.

    “Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I’m actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25.”

  • No Math at All

    All over China, parents tell their children to stop complaining and to finish their quadratic equations and trigonometric functions because there are sixty-five million American kids going to bed with no math at all.

  • Paint My House

    Some smart looking businessman dude was sitting in a bar drinking a beer one night when a gorgeous well-stacked blonde walked in.

    She says, “For $250, I’ll do anything you want, only you have to describe it in three words or less.”

    He thinks about this a minute or so, pulls out $250, and says, “Paint my house.”

  • We’ve All Got It

    “Doc, I think my son has VD,” a patient told his urologist on the phone. “The only woman he’s screwed is our maid.”

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    “Okay, don’t be hard on him. He’s just a kid,” the medic soothed. “Get him in here right away and I’ll take care of him.”

    “But I’ve been screwing the maid too, and I’ve got the same symptoms he has.”

    “Then you come in with him and I’ll fix you both up,” replied the doctor.

    “Well,” the man admitted, “I think my wife has it too.”

    “Oh crap!” the physician roared. “That means we’ve all got it!”