I was banging this hot chick on her kitchen
table when we heard the front door open
She said “it’s my husband!.. Quick, try the
backdoor!”
Thinking back, I really should have ran but you
don’t get offers like that every day.
Tone: raunchy
Raunchy humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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A Kitchen Table
-
First Day at Domino’s
Kyle 🌱
@KylePlantEmoji
[first day at Domino’s]
Manager: oh and one more thing: don’t
fuck the pizzas
Me: haha
Asst Manager: seriously, don’t fuck
them
Cook: don’t fuck the pizzas dude
Me: I’m n-
Customer: that guy’s not gonna fuck my
pizza is he?
Manager: not if he wants to keep his
job he wont. -
A Guy Who Uses Toys During Sex
HER: I LIKE A GUY WHO
USES TOYS DURING SEX
ME: *SHOOTS NURF GUN AT
HER BUTTHOLE DURING SEX*
HER: -
Grimace’s Name
THAT MOMENT YOU REALIZE
GRIMACE IS A GIANT BUTTPLUG
THEN SUDDENLY YOU
REALIZE HOW HE GOT HIS NAME -
When You Finally Get a Girlfriend
WHEN YOU FINALLY
GET A GIRLFRIEND,
BUT YOU FORGOT THAT
YOU DON’T HAVE TO
BLOW HER UP.
