Americans: We have the most advanced country in the world.
Also Americans:
[Open box before eating pizza.]
Tone: Sarcastic
Sarcastic jokes, dry insults, eye-roll energy, and punchlines that need a workplace warning from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Lives With His Wife
Women won’t date a guy that lives with his mom but they will date a guy that lives with his wife
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A poet once asked “What’s in a name?” as a way of teaching
A poet once asked “What’s in a name?” as a way of teaching others to not make superficial judgments. Still, if the name is “Mother Fucking Douche Bag Asswipe III,” I think it would be safe to make at least a few assumptions.
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but go ahead and spend the extra cash and get Famous Amos brand
but go ahead and spend the extra cash and get Famous Amos brand cookies. The generic knock-off Famous Anus Cookies taste like ass.
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Well, the test results are back, and it turns out you *can* get
Well, the test results are back, and it turns out you *can* get a disease from a toilet seat — especially if you have sex with a heroin-addicted hooker on it.
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My boyfriend told me, “I want to take a picture of my cock
My boyfriend told me, “I want to take a picture of my cock between the twins.” WTF? I’m not so sure I want my niece and nephew that close to a rooster!
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I got in trouble at the PTA meeting for suggesting “Wild, Hot
I got in trouble at the PTA meeting for suggesting “Wild, Hot and Horny” as the them for the pre-school auction. Those fucking pervs — I was talking about desert deer.
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“There’s no ‘i’ in team,” my boss told me. I smugly pointed out
“There’s no ‘i’ in team,” my boss told me. I smugly pointed out to him that there’s no “i” in “Fuck you, asshole” either.
