I’m not sure who to call — the patent office? Not to show my hand too soon, but I think I figured out a cheap and easy way to make wet tissues at home.
Tone: witty
Witty humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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“I do declare, there were times when I was so lonesome I took
“I do declare, there were times when I was so lonesome I took some comfort there.” Notice how gentle “cornholing some chick” sounds in folk music?
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American girls are okay, I guess, but when I get ready to settle
American girls are okay, I guess, but when I get ready to settle down, I’ll be looking for a woman who hails from Nicerackistan.
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I like my women like I like my fastballs: high and tight
I like my women like I like my fastballs: high and tight.
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I’m not the kind of girl who whores herself out for booty calls;
I’m not the kind of girl who whores herself out for booty calls; with MY rack, it’s all about Titty Calls.
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I should have known this was a porn restaurant when they gave me
I should have known this was a porn restaurant when they gave me a peanut fluffer and K-Y Jelly sandwich.
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end my workout with a money shot
end my workout with a money shot.
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I love those days when you spend the whole day in your PJs. And
I love those days when you spend the whole day in your PJs. And my co-workers *really* love the crotchless silk teddy I’m wearing.
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My girlfriend has the best tits EVER. Don’t take my word for it
My girlfriend has the best tits EVER. Don’t take my word for it — ask her husband.
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When she told me she would give me the best blowjob I’d ever had
When she told me she would give me the best blowjob I’d ever had for $20, I told her to put my money where her mouth is.
